Sunday, March 26, 2006

some thoughts after reading flor's blog...

she says she feels like a caged bird..longing for freedom...hmm...the last time i ever felt this way was when i was still with zx... which is so long ago it seems... almost 2 years... he is probably the only one which can be named boyfriend to me i guess. the rest just dont seems real... like a dream aka nightmare. 8X. but it's through all the "dreams" that i slowly get to understand what i want n need. but... come to think of it... no matter how clearly i know what i want n need is... it will always be forgotten whenever i fall... muaahhaha. stupid me.

she says she feel like being single.... yet she need constant love...something she dont get from anyone, even her family...

at times, i feel this way too... i guess i am slightly luckier than her to have my family. i always feel comforted and alot happier at sad times whenever my family cares... n i know they really care... i know my mum is really worried whenever i drive... n now... her heart aches when she sees me working till the wee hours every day... n during the weekend... i seems to be dead. haha. i slept straight from 3+pm yest till today 12++pm... but i did wake up for 30mins for dinner. n a hour or so to check some stuff online. n i know they are proud of me even though the outside world doesnt feel the same...not forgetting my dad n bros...

i also have friends who care...n people supporting me...so not that bad lar..

n most importantly... i feel that i am getting more confident... n having lots of drives at work. foresee more OT till may... i am loving myself more n more. muahaha. 8X...

i also have a job which i still loves alot. m willing to devote all my effort, energy n time in it... i might not be earning lots... but... it's enough and i love what i am doing. that's enough right? 8).

minty n ferlyn...your are not forgotten...8).